Why Fathers' Rights?

Losers appropriately punished

Very simply: because after divorce they have none. They are discriminated against, marginalised, not allowed to see their children or participate in their upbringing.

More importantly: because children need them as much as they need their mothers.

Growing up I admired a number of people fighting for equal rights of us all. Most of all I admired Clara Zetkin and her efforts to empower women. I always knew that I wanted to contribute this fight for a more equal world.

Children are one of the most marginalised groups and completely dependent on adults to make this world a better place for them and this is why as a human rights graduate I decided to add my voice to children's rights campaign. However, until recently, I did not envisage how unconventional a fight this would become.

Since coming to Bosnia three years ago I have become aware of the very difficult situation fathers are in throughout the country, but also in neighbouring states. Social workers, lawyers and judges through their prejudiced practices maintain the beliefs in the society that fathers are disposable, uncaring, not needed, cold and incapable of providing their children with relevant and positive influence, guidance and love.

Mothers rule the roost and in case of divorce are awarded everything by the social services and courts: children, maintenance, homes, dignity and support.

More often than not, fathers are punished: their children are taken away from them as well as their money, homes and dignity. They are marginalised, assumed and branded guilty for life before and without ever having a chance to prove themselves innocent.

This is how divorce is dealt with in the Balkans. Conflict settlement where winner takes it all and losers are appropriately punished.

And children?

Completely forgotten. Well, not completely: They are part of the property division deal. They are thrown in as the necessary possession of a divorced woman along maintenance, furniture and homes.

They are the invisible casualties of divorce.

They lose their fathers and they witness their fathers lose everything. They learn about discrimination, marginalisation, control, blame, hate and disrespect.

This is why it is of utmpost importance to open the family door and let the secrets, pain and disrespect that hide behind it into light. This is why the battle for fathers rights is all about the children's needs. The battle for father’s rights is the last battle for equality that will, hopefully, bring democracy into the family.